21 Oct

 

If there is anything that fills me with more terror than animatronics or wax figures, it’s spiders.

I’m sure they mean well, and they have no interest in bothering me at all but I don’t care.

I try to stay as far away from them as possible.

It’s basically why I got married. I have a round the clock spider killer now.

And the best part, other than the fact that he works for free, is that he doesn’t do that stupid thing that men do after they’ve killed a spider for you where they act like they’re going to throw it on you and then laugh as you shriek in terror and start climbing the walls.

So stupid.

That’s grounds for divorce in my book.

I’m pretty sure that any reasonable judge would understand.

“Yes your honor, that’s correct, he pretended to throw a spider at me and then laughed as I ran screaming out the front door and down the street in front of all of our neighbors.”

And can I just say, reparations for emotional damages wouldn’t be a bad idea either.

My spiders aren’t scary. They’re actually pretty sweet even though they do have a bit of an ick factor.

They’re also easy so they are welcome in my house any day.

To make them, the first thing you need to do is make a bunch of Oreo Truffles.

If you have never had these, put them on your to-do list asap.

They’re so good and you can use any flavor of Oreos.

I will say that I prefer to use chocolate chips or candy melts with a little splash of vegetable oil for dipping rather than the Baker’s chocolate called for in the recipe, but you do whatever your heart desires.

To make the spiders, first make two different sized truffles. You’ll need a smaller sized round truffle for the head, and a larger sized truffle for the body. Just use your hands to shape the body so that it looks like a spider’s body.

But before you shape the body completely, add a Gusher (you know those fruit snacks kids love that have the juicy centers?) to the middle and form the truffle around it. That way when people bite into the spider’s body, they’ll get a disgusting yet tasty surprise.

After you’ve dipped the truffles in chocolate, sprinkle on some black sugar sprinkles (this gives them a gross hairy look) and put them on parchment paper to set up. You need to add the sprinkles while the chocolate is still wet though or they won’t stick.

While the truffles are hardening, cut strips of black licorice. You’ll need 8 legs per spider (obviously).

To assemble, just lay the head and body of the spider onto a frosted cupcake. Then carefully tuck the legs into the frosting under the body.

You can pipe or dab on bright green frosting for the eyes, or you can just attach candy eyes while the chocolate is still wet.

 

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